Overcoming Communication Barriers Between People

When you send a message, you intend to communicate meaning, but the message itself doesn't contain meaning. The meaning exists in your mind and in the mind of your receiver. To understand one another, you and your receiver must share similar meanings for words, gestures, tone of voice, and other symbols.

1. Differences in perception

The world constantly bombards us with information: sights, sounds, scents, and so on. Our minds organize this stream of sensation into a mental map that represents our perception or reality. In no case is the perception of a certain person the same as the world itself, and no two maps are identical. As you view the world, your mind absorbs your experiences in a unique and personal way. Because your perceptions are unique, the ideas you want to express differ from other people's Even when two people have experienced the same event, their mental images of that event will not be identical. As senders, we choose the details that seem important and focus our attention on the most relevant and general, a process known as selective perception. As receivers, we try to fit new details into our existing pattern. If a detail doesn't quite fit, we are inclined to distort the information rather than rearrange the pattern.

Overcoming Communication Barriers Between People

2. Incorrect filtering

Filtering is screening out before a message is passed on to someone else. In business, the filters between you and your receiver are many; secretaries, assistants, receptionists, answering machines, etc. Those same gatekeepers may also 'translate' your receiver's ideas and responses before passing them on to you. To overcome filtering barriers, try to establish more than one communication channel, eliminate as many intermediaries as possible, and decrease distortion by condensing message information to the bare essentials.

3. Language problems

When you choose the words for your message, you signal that you are a member of a particular culture or subculture and that you know the code. The nature of your code imposes its own barriers on your message. Barriers also exist because words can be interpreted in more than one way. Language is an arbitrary code that depends on shared definitions, but there's a limit to how completely any of us share the same meaning for a given word. To overcome language barriers, use the most specific and accurate words possible. Always try to use words your audience will understand. Increase the accuracy of your messages by using language that describes rather than evaluates and by presenting observable facts, events, and circumstances.

4. Poor listening

Perhaps the most common barrier to reception is simply a lack of attention on the receiver's part. We all let our minds wander now and then, regardless of how hard we try to concentrate. People are essentially likely to drift off when they are forced to listen to information that is difficult to understand or that has little direct bearing on their own lives. Too few of us simply do not listen well! To overcome barriers, paraphrase what you have understood, try to view the situation through the eyes of other speakers and resist jumping to conclusions. Clarify meaning by asking non-threatening questions, and listen without interrupting.

5. Differing emotional states

Every message contains both a content meaning, which deals with the subject of the message, and a relationship meaning, which suggests the nature of the interaction between sender and receiver. Communication can break down when the receiver reacts negatively to either of these meanings. You may have to deal with people when they are upset or when you are. An upset person tends to ignore or distort what the other person is saying and is often unable to present feelings and ideas effectively. This is not to say that you should avoid all communication when you are emotionally involved, but you should be alert to the greater potential for misunderstanding that accompanies aroused emotions. To overcome emotional barriers, be aware of the feelings that arise in your self and in others as you communicate, and attempt to control them. Most important, be alert to the greater potential for misunderstanding that accompanies emotional messages.

6. Differing backgrounds

Differences in background can be one of the hardest communication barriers to overcome. Age, education, gender, social status, economic position, cultural background, temperament, health, beauty, popularity, religion, political belief, even a passing mood can all separate one person from another and make understanding difficult. To overcome the barriers associated with differing backgrounds, avoid projecting your own background or culture onto others. Clarify your own and understand the background of others, spheres of knowledge, personalities and perceptions and don't assume that certain behaviors mean the same thing to everyone.

If you would like to get custom-made advice about your communication problems, please feel free to email me at martinmim21@hotmail.com All requests will be handled professionally and your communication problem will be handled in strict confidence.

Overcoming Communication Barriers Between People
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Martin Hahn Ph.D. is an industrial sociologist with more than 20 years experience in teaching, management consulting, and corporate training. The above article is an excerpt from the ebook titled 'Overcoming Communication Barriers between People and in Organizations'. His ebook on communication can be purchased at http://www.martinimhahn.com

Effective Negotiation Strategies - Being Prepared

On numerous occasions, I have participated in negotiations as a technical consultant on behalf of clients. In order to save time and money, the client often prepares for these negotiations themselves. Through many previous bad experiences, I have learned to ask clients in advance what their idea of negotiation strategies and being prepared actually is. Their answers often show, however, that they are not yet ready to begin an effective negotiation session.

Inexperienced, lazy, or naive negotiators believe that being prepared means 'knowing what they want' out of the negotiations, which generally implies that they have decided on terms that they would be happy with. They may even have given some thought to their worst case scenario, but that tends to be the extent of their negotiation strategies and preparations.

Knowing what you want from a negotiation is only a small part of what it takes to be prepared. The key to success is knowing how you are going to get what you want. Success comes from having effective negotiation strategies that convince the other side that what you want is actually fair and reasonable - or, at the very least, inevitable.

Effective Negotiation Strategies - Being Prepared

Ill-Prepared Negotiators

Most negotiators do not prepare appropriately. Even when large amounts of money are involved, people typically rely on past or similar situations to determine negotiation strategies. They expect to use their wits and develop a strategy on the fly. At best, planning for an effective negotiation session is one-sided and incomplete.

Skilled negotiators love ill-prepared opponents because their negotiation strategies are easier to manipulate. The lack of effective negotiation preparation on the part of their opponent makes their job much easier and allows them to overwhelm the other side with a higher degree of knowledge, preparation, research, and hard-hitting demands.

Being prepared requires that you have some idea of the other party's desired outcomes. A plan is only realistic if you know what the other side wants, and you've figured out a way to give it to them (while getting what you want) or have figured out a way to change their minds to agree with your demands. The more you know about what the other team wants the less there is to negotiate and the easier it is to get an equitable agreement through a stream-lined, effective negotiation session.

Determining Failure or Success

Success is determined when a mutual agreement is met and both sides are satisfied without any hard feelings. To achieve this, you'll need to consider the other side's needs as well as your own.

After all, an effective negotiation should not be a winner-take-all type of contest. The vast majority of negotiations take place with people who you will need to work with after the negotiations have come to a close. If they feel cheated or resentful about a deal that was struck, the working relationship will be harmed.

Failure is judged in terms of potentially damaged relationships or by a deal that you are unhappy with. A failed negotiation might very well be the one in which you got everything you wanted (or thought you did) but ended up damaging your working relationship with a colleague, supplier, or competitor.

It is not uncommon for the purchasing department of large companies to squeeze small suppliers and contractors to the point where there is no profit (or incentive) in the contract that is ultimately signed. The result is a contractor that provides minimal or poor quality service and products. In this context, who is the winner of the negotiations? No one is. Everyone loses.

Successful Preparation Tactics

When planning effective negotiation strategies, it's best to develop a list of objectives for ourselves and imagine what the position would be for the other side. Are they likely to agree to our terms or not? If not, why not? What would they agree to? Taking a win-win approach to effective negotiation strategies creates allies not enemies.

For an effective negotiation session, strategize with the big picture in mind: focus on long-term objectives, not short-term. Preserve relationships even if at the cost of short-term victories. And remember that the next negotiation begins the minute the last one ended. Being prepared means knowing how you are going to get the other side to agree and be happy with the deal you want or need. Being prepared requires planning, strategy, and tactics.

Strategy is developed from your analysis of what are reasonable targets and objectives. Your negotiation strategies are your approach to how you are going to convince the other side to agree to what you want. Tactics are specific, identifiable manoeuvres that implement the negotiation strategies.

Consider this example - a car salesman wants to sell cars for as much as possible. You want to pay the least. But does the car salesman also want you as a long-term customer? Do they want a trade-in car from you? Do they want to provide financing and maintenance? Is there anything other than low price that can be negotiated with a car salesman?

If the salesman only wants the highest possible selling price, your only bargaining chip is knowledge about prices at other dealerships. If, however, the salesman is interested in other aspects of the deal, then there are more details that can be negotiated in order to get you the lowest possible price.

Knowing what the salesman is interested other than just price allows you to develop more sophisticated, effective negotiation strategies and related tactics.

Preparation Checklist

Your targets: Identify objectives and justifications along with their relative priorities. Their targets: Identify what you expect the other side's objectives, justifications, and priorities to be. Strategy: Create an effective negotiation plan for convincing the other side to agree to the terms you want, keeping in mind a long-term, big picture view. Tactics: Specific approaches to how you will present your arguments (i.e. negotiation strategies) in a convincing way. Response to tactics: Predict the other side's tactics and plan your reactions and counter-tactics. Room to move: Be prepared with some pre-determined options to provide you with flexibility in what is asked and offered.
Be Prepared

Negotiating is the art of convincing the other side that you should get what you want. Being prepared for effective negotiation involves a lot more than just knowing what you want. Effective negotiation strategies mean knowing what you would settle for and how you are going to convince the other side to give it to you.

Comprehensive negotiation strategies include prepared reactions to the strategy and tactics of the other side. When you take the time to predict what the other side is likely to want and do and then integrate these predictions into your negotiation strategy, you are among those rare individuals who truly are prepared for negotiations.

Negotiation is a contest. Fortune favours the prepared mind (and negotiator). If you want to be a winner, be properly prepared.

Effective Negotiation Strategies - Being Prepared
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Brian Egan, the President and owner of a giftware manufacturing company called The Book Box Company Inc., is also a management consultant with over twenty years experience in manufacturing and project management. Brian has graduate degrees in Oceanography (M.Sc.) and Finance (M.B.A.) as well as PMP certification. In addition to project management services, Brian provides professional development training to companies, including WestLake Training and Development, an information technology training company, who want to improve their performance by incorporating the best of management science methodologies into their operations.

Bachelor Degree - BA Vs. BS

There are a lot of people who wonder why some bachelor degrees, when you get them, designate you as a bachelor of arts and other bachelor degrees designate you as a bachelor of science. Well, the answer is very simple.

A Bachelor of Arts degree goes to somebody who gets a bachelor degree in any non-technical, or science related field. A Bachelor of Science degree goes to somebody who does get a degree in a science related field. The designations are set up by the colleges themselves.

So, what's the difference? Does it really matter?

Bachelor Degree - BA Vs. BS

The answer to that question may shock you. It matters very much.

The reasons will not be immediately apparent to the student, but when he or she goes into the real world to get a job, they are going to be in for a rude awakening if they're looking for a specific type of job and don't have a bachelor of science degree.

If you're scratching your head wondering why this even matters, the answer is as follows. Most Bachelor of Science programs are a little more intense than a Bachelor of Arts program. In other words, in addition to the degree having to be in a science related field, the degree itself will contain more required courses than a Bachelor of Arts degree. Of course this varies from college to college, but within each school the bachelor of science program is always more intense than the bachelor of arts program. There may be one more required course per semester, or more science courses required. The bottom line translation is, the program is harder to get through; in some cases, a lot harder.

So why does this matter? Well, there are certain jobs, such as in the fields of engineering, chemistry and physics, just to name a few, where if you look in the classified ads in your local paper, it will clearly say, "bachelor of science degree required". So if you graduated college with a bachelor of arts degree, you won't be able to apply for that job. Oh, you can still send in your resumé, but don't expect to be called in for an interview.

Now, here is where this becomes very important. There are some colleges that will allow you to get a Bachelor of Arts degree in math, which is technically one of the sciences. The program doesn't have as many requirements. So when you graduate, while you technically have a degree in one of the sciences, because of the fact that you don't have a bachelor of science degree, you will not be eligible for that particular job that says "bachelor of science degree required".

It may seem like a nit picky thing, but these companies want to know that you can get through the tougher curriculum. They want to know that you have a good chance of being able to handle the job that you're applying for. Is there a really big difference between a bachelor of arts and bachelor of science degree? In an undergraduate program, probably not too much. But in the minds of the companies, where there is so much competition for jobs, it is a big deal.

Bachelor Degree - BA Vs. BS
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Michael Russell Your Independent Bachelor Degree guide.

Negotiation Strategy Vs Tactics

I have spent over twenty-five years now studying, practicing, and teaching martial arts. This includes time spent in the United States Army and living in Japan and Korea studying martial arts there. Two important concepts that I have studied, taught, and written about in a martial or military format are equally important when teaching negotiation. These concepts are strategy and tactics. Sometimes I see people mistakenly using one term when they actually mean the other. In this short article, I want to describe the differences between strategy and tactics as well as illustrate the relationship between the two.

Strategy

Strategy is the overall, big picture, plan, which includes goals or desired outcomes. In the military, strategy is the utilization, during both peace and war, or all of a nation's forces, through large-scale, long-range planning and development, to ensure security or victory. Another definition would be a plan, method, or series of maneuvers or stratagems for obtaining a specific goal or result. A well known strategy used by the Allies in WWII was that of strategic bombing in Europe. The Army Air Corps' strategic bombing doctrine was based on the theory that a bombing force could pound the adversary until its industrial base was destroyed, and with it, its ability and will to wage war. While this example helps illustrate the concept of strategy, it is unfortunate that many of us have probably encountered negotiators that worked from a very similar strategic doctrine.

Negotiation Strategy Vs Tactics

Strategic negotiation is simply the act of devising and carrying out a well thought out plan to achieve your desired outcomes. Often, it is your plan to convince another party to give you something that you want and on your terms. The first thing you must determine when developing a negotiation strategy is what do you really want? What is the purpose of the negotiation? Do you want to purchase a house or commercial building? Do you want a raise in your salary? Do you want to settle a matter that is being litigated? Once you know what you want, and have devised a strategy, you can implement the tactics that will help you achieve your desired outcome.

When one is developing strategy, it is often easier to break your planning into phases. Here is a simple model used with martial arts and warfare that you will notice fits with negotiating equally well:

1. Identify your strategic objectives
2. Collect intelligence
3. Plan for environment
4. Program for engagement

Tactics

Tactics are simply the means by which you carry out your strategy. In the military tactics deals with the use and deployment of troops in actual combat, more specifically, it is the military science that deals with securing objectives set by strategy, especially the technique of deploying and directing troops, ships, and aircraft in effective maneuvers against an enemy. In our example above with the Army Air Corps, the tight formations employed by the bombers to make the best use of the bombers' heavy armament and prevent German fighters from singling out and swarming on lone planes is an example of a tactic used to help carry out the strategy. Another tactic was the employment of high altitude bombing when low level bombing proved to vulnerable to anti-aircraft fire.

One must be very careful not to focus upon activity, means, or tactics at the expense of accomplishment, achieving goals, or desired outcomes. Above all else, obtaining one's objectives in negotiations should be paramount. Of course, the tactics, activities or means we use should always be appropriate and ethical, but we must remember they are merely the ways to attain desired outcomes. Examples of negotiation tactics include things such as:

1. Giving ultimatums
2. Nibbling
3. Shocked or surprised looks
4. Good cop/Bad cop
5. Walk away

There are many tactics people use while negotiating. There is nothing wrong with using certain tactics to carry out your strategy and obtain your objectives. It is not necessarily unethical, deceptive, or unscrupulous to use negotiating tactics, even though some may want you to believe this. Yes, some tactics may be unethical, and as I stated above, we should always be appropriate and ethical, but there is nothing wrong with being competitive.

No, I have not forgotten the Principled Negotiation strategy taught by Fisher and Ury in "Getting To Yes." However, I also realize that sometimes we will be in competitive negotiations, and knowing various tactics can give us the edge. As an attorney, I realize some clients hire an attorney to be their pit bull, and while win-win might be the ideal, some of these clients only care about a win in their column. Practically speaking, we attorneys must deliver for our clients if we want to stay in business. In other fields of business, you run across competitive barganing as well, and knowing tactics may be quite beneficial. Additionally, knowing various negotiation tactics, and the counterattacks, prepare us for when others use them against us.

Conclusion

Strategy and tactics are concepts as old as conflict itself. By understanding the differences and relationships between the two, the successful negotiator can better plan and implement the strategies and tactics to reach specific desired outcomes. There is a reason so many successful business people study the ancient military classics such as "The Art of War" and "The Book of Five Rings." There is a reason why so many successful business people play strategic military games such as Go and Chess. The lessons learned from military sources, especially strategy and tactics, can easily be adapted to help us be better business people, better litigators, and better negotiators.

Negotiation Strategy Vs Tactics
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Alain Burrese, J.D. is a mediator/attorney with Bennett Law Office P.C. and an author/speaker through his own company Burrese Enterprises Inc. He writes and speaks about a variety of topics focusing on the business areas of negotiation and success principles as well as self-defense and safety topics. He is the author of Hard-Won Wisdom From the School of Hard Knocks, several instructional dvds, and numerous articles. You can find out more about Alain Burrese at his websites http://www.burrese.com or http://www.bennettlawofficepc.com

Sample Late Payment Explanation Letter

When you write a creditor to explain your late payments (mortgage, car, or credit card), the letter should state:

why you are late, (see paragraph 1 of the letter below) how serious you are about fulfilling your commitment to them (paragraph 2 of the letter below), and when you expect to be able to resume full and regular payments, (paragraph 3 of the letter below), what you want from them (paragraph 4 of the letter below) the financial details of your hardship (paragraph 5 of the letter below)

Below is a sample late payment explanation letter. Change it to describe your own circumstances, but make sure that you enclose copies of financial documents like: checking account statements, tax returns (past two years), all bills from creditors, all late notices, pink slip, anything else that will prove your hardship.

Sample Late Payment Explanation Letter

Cindy R. Williams

9 Turnbill Ct.

Anywhere, USA 55555

To: ABC Mortgage

Re: Late Payments; Account # 12345678

Daytime phone number: (555)555-5555

I am writing to inform you of my recent financial hardship. I was laid off from my job at XYZ Company just before Christmas of 2008. I am diligently seeking other employment, but as you know, jobs are scarce in today's economy. I have not found anything yet. Being out of work has caused me to be late on my bills.

I believe in hard work and have never been without a job for more than a few months. Until this unfortunate event, I have maintained a solid payment history with you.

My goal is to pay everything I owe. I take my financial obligations very seriously and plan to continue regular and full payments as soon as I find a job.

I expect my situation to be temporary and would like to discuss loan forbearance. I would also appreciate any suggestions you might have that would help me get back on track.

Please find the enclosed spreadsheet of my monthly expenses, as well as copies of financial documents, my pink slip from XYZ Co, and late notices I have received during my financial setback. I'm sending these to show that I am indeed experiencing financial hardship. This letter and all documents attached are true and accurate to the best of my knowledge.

Thank you for your time. I hope to hear from you soon.

Sincerely,

Signature/Date

Forbearance is an agreement by a creditor to reduce or delay payments for a specified period of time. Interest accrues during forbearance and will increase your loan amount. The good thing is that you will not have to pay late fees and penalties. There is no negative affect on your credit either.

Sample Late Payment Explanation Letter
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Learn from Lyn Collier's years of Real Estate experience.

Read simple, to-the-point articles about avoiding costly mistakes and how to get the best loan modification at http://www.e-home-mortgage-loans.com/index.html